NOSE LIFT!

Yesterday at work, after doing 2-days’ job in less than half a working day; I and Nkem decided to go for lunch….that’s a story for another day. We took the elevator from the second floor to the ground floor, but the 20seconds in the elevator was almost like a life-time of torment. From the moment we stepped into the elevator, the stench that welcomed us was far more than anything I can describe. I have never thought or imagined that a living human could smell so bad. And there are both radio and television commercials on Sure, Nivea and the rest…they don’t seem to get the message!

There were about 4people in the elevator, a lady and 3guys…then came I and Nkem. Whoever it was had his armpits on some funky groove; for a moment there, I thought someone took off their shoes. The thing with such an offensive odor is that it links you to the producer, so to say! This guy was standing right at the corner just as you step into the lift, so he welcomes you with his version of Air wick. Holding our breath was the only impossible option…we could only give eye contacts and breathe with a frown on our faces. It was like we could taste this guy’s stench through our nostrils….eeeeew!!!

And of all days, the elevator seems to be moving really slow today. I’m seriously having second thoughts about still going for lunch. He’s totally taken away my appetite, I’m not sure I can even take water. The moment the doors of the lift slid open, I think my nose jumped out first. The rush of fresh air that passed through my lungs was the best feeling I’ve had since last month…#wink-wink!

I’m not friends with this guy, but I think someone has to tell him about his skunk attributes of his! I could buy him a gift set of deodorants but it would be misunderstood as me giving him the green light. That would be a smelly affair though!